5 Tips for AAPI Diaspora to Thrive During the Holidays

Visual List of 5 Tips

The media makes the holiday season out to always seem joyous but that isn’t always true for the AAPI diaspora.  However, for many American born AAPI individuals, the holidays aren’t always as stress-free. Navigating family expectations, cultural traditions, and personal boundaries can make the season more stressful. Especially when you’re juggling multiple identities, it can feel overwhelming. If you’re an American born AAPI individual looking to make the most of the holiday season, here are five strategies to not only survive—but thrive

Manage Family Expectations

Navigating family expectations is one of the many challenges during the holidays as an American-born AAPI individual. Whether the topic turns to career, school, or other family roles, the pressure to comply can be overwhelming. It is important to remember that setting boundaries and keeping them consistent is okay. It is more important to prioritize your emotional well-being than to comply with AAPI diaspora expectations. 

Create New Traditions That Reflect You

As an American-born AAPI individual,  you may have thought about how you now view the world as someone living with dual identities. You may feel like some of the traditional holidays and customs no longer align with your core values and beliefs. That’s perfectly normal!  You don’t have to follow everything from your heritage. Creating your own traditions that reflect your personal experiences can make the holiday more meaningful.

Jennifer’s Thoughts

As I now live alone, for the past few years, I’ve embraced both Eastern and Western holidays to create my own holiday traditions that reflect who I am. Some examples include:

• Thanksgiving For One: Instead of preparing a traditional feast, I’ve started a new tradition of buying a Thanksgiving sandwich from a local restaurant instead of attempting to make a holiday turkey for one.

• Friendship Celebrations: I attend Christmas Tree Lightings or even other local holiday festivities with friends. It’s a fun way to celebrate with those closest to me.

• Cultural Fusion: For Chinese New Year, I make it a point to buy glutinous rice balls to honor my heritage. One year, I attempted to make dumplings but ended up with meatballs. It was a great way to try and reconnect with my cultural heritage with my own spin on it.

  These small, personal traditions have allowed me to blend my cultural heritage with my own identity, making the holidays feel more meaningful and unique to me.

Set Boundaries for Self-Care

In a prior blog post, I mentioned how to set boundaries. It becomes even more important as the holidays arrive. Like it was mentioned earlier, the holidays can often feel overwhelming, especially when balancing family expectations and personal well-being. Setting boundaries can protect your mental health and your loved ones. Take time for yourself and practice self-care.  If you do decide to partake in family traditions, ensure that you are able to without feeling drained. Remember that it is also perfectly fine to opt out. 

Embrace Emotional and Cultural Conflicts

The conflict we feel as American-born AAPI diaspora members can be heightened during the holiday season. You may feel torn between feeling a sense of duty to be at family traditions but may also want to explore your own traditions  Understand that you may feel a mix of emotions during this time period, embrace the emotions, understand that these complexities are a part of your identity and it’s a unique experience that only American-born AAPI diaspora members understand. If things get difficult, please reach out to a mental health professional.

Attempt To Let Go of Perfectionism

As American-born AAPI diaspora members, some of us grew up with high standards, and the pressure to meet them never really goes away. Sometimes it can stay with us and grow under the holiday season. Slowly learn to let go of that need of perfection and learn to embrace mistakes as learning experiences. Remember what the holidays are truly about: connection, gratitude, and love - not perfection. But also understand that the process takes time. 

DearTherapy Invitation

What strategies have you used to cope with the holiday season as an American-born AAPI individual? Share your experiences in the comments below—let’s support each other during this time of year!